Mindfully Moody | Highest Self, Manifestation, Dating Advice & Feminine Energy

140: How to Balance Masculine & Feminine Energy in Yourself: Real Talk With Our Own Struggles

• Hannah Andersen and Sara Swanson • Season 3 • Episode 39

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Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the constant pressure to achieve and succeed, only to find yourself drowning in stress and unhealthy habits? We know the feeling all too well. On this episode of Mindfully Moody, we share our personal stories of grappling with the overpowering dominance of masculine energy and how it led us down a path of anxiety, excessive drinking, and overeating. Discover how we've made a significant shift towards healthier routines like breathwork, ice baths, journaling, and mindful eating, allowing us to reclaim our feminine energy and foster a more balanced and fulfilling lifestyle.

Tune in as we explore the delicate equilibrium between masculine and feminine energies, especially for female entrepreneurs striving for personal well-being and professional success. We dive into the practical strategies we’ve adopted for achieving this balance, such as setting work boundaries and scheduling downtime to reconnect with nature and loved ones. Through our own experiences, we emphasize the importance of recognizing when you’re leaning too heavily on one side and offer actionable tips to adjust accordingly. Whether you’re navigating business, relationships, or daily life, this episode will guide you towards a more harmonious and fulfilling existence.

Listeners are encouraged to tune into their bodies and recognize the signs of imbalance. For instance, if you find yourself constantly driven by a to-do list and feeling overwhelmed, it may be a sign that your masculine energy is taking over. In such cases, practices like breathwork, meditation, and journaling can help shift the balance back towards the feminine. The hosts also discuss the importance of keeping plans loose to allow for spontaneity and flow, which are key aspects of feminine energy.

The episode wraps up with a reminder that achieving a balance between masculine and feminine energies is a continuous journey. It's about being mindful of where you are at any given moment and having the tools to adjust accordingly. The hosts invite listeners to join their community on social media and explore additional resources, including their self-love formula and upcoming retreats.

Wishing you a week full of love, light, and healing, beautiful souls.

xoxo,
Sara & Hannah

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Sara:

If you clicked to listen to this episode, you are struggling right now because your masculine energy is roaring its head. You cannot get out of your own freaking way. Your to-do list never stops. You go to bed at night and all that you're thinking about is all of the things that you should have done today and all of the things that you need to do tomorrow. And this is choking your feminine energy, your creative energy, your sensual flow from being activated right now, because you are constantly in this structure of go, go, go. So if this is, you, keep listening, because we are about to unravel all of our magic through this episode and get into our vulnerable stories of how this has happened in our lives and is currently happening. So tune in for more.

Hannah:

What's up, babes Mindfully Moody. On the mic it's Hannah and I'm joined by my bestie and co-host, sarah, and we are so excited to have you on another episode of Mindfully Moody. We are getting into the juice today talking about feminine and masculine energy, and before we get into the episode, I want to let you guys know our self-love formula is out, it's ready for you to consume, and I just want to share a couple of things that we did to Specifically transform in our lives. We literally used to be the girls at the bar Chugging vodka shots out the bottle just so we could be ourselves. Okay, and now we're literally spending Saturday nights at the coffee shop journaling about how much we love our lives. We used to be the type of girls who would order three boxes of Domino's pizza to escape emotions that we didn't want to feel because we were so anxious, and now we have self-love practices that help us feel better and make ourselves feel healed and tap into our feminine energy. So these are just a few examples of things that we used to do because we felt like shit about ourselves, and we now have these new tools that really help us tap into our higher selves, heal from the shit that held us back. And this is exactly what we do in the self-love formula.

Hannah:

It is our 75 page workbook and 15 video course, along with the community, that you guys can get access to literally right now, immediately. You can drop down in the show notes and get 50% off. This deal is not going to last long. So if you want to heal yourself, if you want to feel better and really start to feel that inner love inside of your heart, then go and check it out in the show notes. Let's get into the topic now. Let's dive in. Sarah. Feminine masculine energies. How do we know? How do we know when the masculine energy is taking over in the driver's seat and controlling our life?

Sara:

I'm gonna answer that, but I just have to say first that I just have to get some of my laughter out first. But also, when you were saying the thing about dominoes, like I was literally thinking about that is that was my walk of shame.

Sara:

You know, like you were getting like waking up in the morning, not the morning really the afternoon 12, 30 on a Saturday and I'm ordering dominoes from the app on my phone and I'm doing the walk of shame to my apartment door to pick up a large pan pizza with extra cheese and toppings and a cheesy bread and a two liter of diet coke like that was literally my walk of shame.

Hannah:

Oh my god, no. And literally like we would do that, like one we're so anxious one. We were just like probably completely regretting sorry guys. We promise we'll get into the episode soon, but you need to hear this um, we're probably extremely regretful of us. What we did in the night before dancing on tabletops, having conversations with people that we probably should, getting in cars that we should not have, drove in, drinking one too many fucking vodka shots, it's like. And then we're like trying to escape the anxiety. Right, we have such bad anxiety now we have sunday scaries now we're worried about that presentation that we have to give on monday at work, and it's like we were using food to escape, just like. Let me get five more hours of right, a dopamine hit exactly.

Sara:

Let me just get throw on reality tv, drown out all of my fears escape like just severe escapism, going from one escape to the next. The night was the alcohol, the day was well, and also I'd get super freaking stoned to just like, yeah, shut off any possible thing that could be running through my mind and then I would eat this pizza until I literally felt so sick and I know so many people can relate to this. As I'm saying this, though, I'm like as.

Sara:

I'm saying this though I'm like go for a slice. It's been so long To that capacity.

Hannah:

You know what I mean. It's like that and that is the power of change Like, okay, To be honest, it's just you do things differently. One, we don't drink yes, you know drink at that capacity anymore where we're just trying to escape the severe anxiety that we were feeling, and it's just we do things differently now. I mean whatever. If you want to order Uber Eats I do that sometimes too and I get a pizza. Maybe I get a smaller pizza, Maybe I don't eat the whole freaking extra large pizza, but it's like we're going out to dinner on a Friday night with our friends or your husband. You know you're going to a nice pizza place if you want pizza, Right, Exactly. If you're anxious, if you're, you know, feeling so concerned and worried about something. We're using different practices. We're choosing the healthier route. We're going to breathwork classes, we're going to do an ice bath we're going to work out.

Hannah:

it's like and that's what we teach you guys in the self-love formula is tools to choose a healthier path, because escaping with the food, escaping with the weed, escaping with the alcohol is just going to put you in an endless cycle of never improving.

Sara:

Yes, Shout out to Domino's we get a sponsorship from Domino's now.

Hannah:

Okay, roll it back.

Sara:

Back to the episode. Without further ado, without more laughs, we'll get back into the episode. But actually that was a nice segue, because masculine and feminine energies, the way that you are feeling right now you listening to this episode is the same way that actually I'm feeling right now. That's why I wanted to talk about this topic and get vulnerable and real about this. But this way that I have been feeling I'm really feeling today I think I'm processing through a lot of things today specifically is not super dissimilar from what I used to feel in the sense of, you know, misalignment and just like I need to deepen into something that feels more right and connected to me. I didn't interpret it as that at the time. Right Because I didn't have the tools that I do now.

Sara:

But when I would start to feel, ok, there's this thing that's kind of taking over in my life, there's this energy, I would look to food, I would go to alcohol, I would go to you know, going out and partying with my friends and trying to turn off my brain.

Sara:

Now I'm like turning to meditation and journaling and speaking about it vulnerably, and I'm going to do breath work today, like tuning into those things that will actually show me how I can heal and work through what I'm going through right now, versus stuff it down literally.

Sara:

So that was a nice little precursor to the topic, but what we're talking about is masculine energy, how it keeps us, as women, in a spiral that a lot of times is undesirable and keeps us really deeply connected to a to-do list, to tasks, to this constant talk track in your mind of oh my gosh, I didn't complete this and this person I need to be accountable to, and now I feel like I'm failing and oh my gosh, and it just can all of a sudden become this you know I'm thinking of like a barrel going down a hill and it's like, oh my god, now I'm just rolling, rolling, rolling and I don't know how to stop and I feel out of control.

Sara:

That's that's what we're getting into, because so many of us are in this experience and it could be. This isn't something that I feel super regularly. I feel like I'm in it right now, but I did feel it regularly all the time in my earlier life and it became my identity. It was one of the main reasons why I had such severe anxiety Like this was a major source of my pain and anxiety in my life and we want to offer our support, our guidance, our tools, the things that we do in our lives to shift out of this super masculine structure and into something that is a more balance between masculine and feminine, so that you can have the life that you desire to have.

Hannah:

I feel like in life we're always ebbing and flowing right. There's situations that happen and it makes us lean a little bit more. This way we start to feel really good and flowy, we feel safe, we start to lean more on our feminine and like I think it's knowing that right, that we are all on this mindfully moody journey, that life is going up and down, and it's like how can we have the tools to be able to shift easily and effortlessly in those moments, like in you guys? We've recorded so many episodes on feminine and masculine energy. You can go look back at you know.

Hannah:

I don't know the number specifically, but there's a ton that we did, but it's, I think, recognizing you're in this moment You're saying I'm feeling like I'm so driven in my masculine right now. Of course. You were running like five businesses you're, you know, running the home. You're married. You're, you know, trying to get this business up and running. Like you're managing circles. It's like you have so much going on and okay, that's this like sense of acceptance, of like, okay, yeah, wow, that makes sense that I'm in my masculine energy right now because I have all of these incredible, amazing moving parts happening. And one is that step of acknowledgement Okay, yeah, of course. And then it's like giving yourself that love.

Hannah:

But we talk about how you have both masculine and feminine energies within you, right, and in your life, and so when you can start to recognize and say, wow, I'm feeling like I've been in a masculine, you know, 70% of the time. Maybe it's time to recognize and say, okay, how can I shift, how can I soften, soften, how can I move more into my feminine in these different areas? For me, I definitely resonate with that. For work, it's been different for me because I feel like I've been more in my feminine the past few months and now I'm more locking into my masculine, which feels really good for me right now.

Hannah:

But in relationships like last week too, a few weeks ago, I feel like I was so in my masculine and having similar feelings as you of like, why am I controlling this? Ah, this is like feeling so frustrating, this does not feel good and how can I shift it? And I've, I've had a shift of like, recognizing that like, okay, I noticed I'm trying to control situations, I'm trying to, you know, latch on and make sure that X, y and Z happens so I feel I'm safe, trying to protect myself. And since then I've been leaning in more into that heart space, that loving space, allowing, releasing, letting go. And so I think just the step one is having the awareness and putting a number on it being like OK, how much am I leaning this far in business in my masculine? You know?

Sara:

Yeah, I think it is a really delicate balance, because we really have to achieve both in order to create, especially if you want to be an entrepreneur. You are someone. Even if you're not an entrepreneur, you're someone that's dedicated to your career, whatever you do, your purpose, your passion. Many of us have to be in our masculine in some, at least for some of the time. Yeah, so for me, what I feel like I've been experiencing is that I have to be in my masculine so much that the times that I desire to be in my feminine, I really can't be, because I'm just recovering from being in my masculine.

Sara:

And I feel like, a lot of times, the scrolling on TikTok for whatever, the desire to constantly, you know, have your attention on something. Like, if you're someone that struggles and I definitely struggle with this, I go in and out of this. That you know I I'm not doing my makeup or getting ready in silence. You know I'm like I'm watching something on my phone. I'm putting something on my phone, I'm putting something on my TV. I'm like like I'm constantly just needing to be engaged in some sort of way and for me, I feel like that is because I am constantly like recovering, trying to recover from this go, go, go, and because my nervous system can be so overwhelmed when I get too far into my masculine. It almost becomes jarring when you get out of that, so you're searching to get back into that through the phone.

Sara:

The dopamine hits the. You know like there's there's this, this desire of like. I need to still be doing something you know what I mean, even if it's being on your phone or I need to numb out because I need to recover from constantly doing something. So this is when I start seeing it as an issue in my life, is when I'm like starting to struggle to. You know, have a day like today. I usually I'm working in person at the gallery and today I'm home and, like you know, it's like I had this big OK, I want to do this, this, this, this and this.

Sara:

And my, my mind, body and soul was like girl you need it like, but it caused me significant stress and then, before we got on and we're recording, I was like, oh my gosh, like it puts me in that thing of yeah, now I can't even rest in my feminine, because I'm still in my masculine while I'm thinking about resting, because I'm thinking of it as a failure.

Hannah:

Yeah.

Sara:

You know. So that's just my raw, vulnerable share of what is coming up for me right now. But I think that when you go too far into one or the other, you could also be going way too far into your feminine, and then you could be floating off into the sunset and not be grounded and not be making money, not being able to support yourself, not being able to get into your power, your solar plexus. To get into your power, your solar plexus, you're. You're just not rooted in your power center because you're so in your feminine, so that can cause an issue as well yeah, yeah, what you were saying about like recognizing patterns that you would do when you were in that cycle.

Hannah:

It reminded me of, like you know, learning about binge eating tendencies and like what is the trigger? And how can I kind of redirect the trigger into something new? Right, like, if I know that I want to like binge eat at this time, what is something I can do instead? And yeah, I just thought that that could be like even for myself of like, okay, when I'm in that reoccurring cycle, what is a new thing? Not necessarily a thing, but something new that I could do. Right, like you know, going in nature I know that makes how connected that makes you to your feminine.

Hannah:

For me, I've had this practice of like I get that, of like me wanting to escape. So now I'm on TikTok, now I'm on my computer, now I'm like going in the kitchen and looking for food. It's like that pattern of escape. And I have this thing now where I just like lay on my ground, I put my phone down and I just like put my legs up on the sofa and I just like sit there and like that's like a grounding exercise, like, okay, take some breaths, stop trying to distract yourself, drop into the moment and it's like just that silence can be so helpful. But I it's. We have to physically pull ourselves out of that sometimes because it's just like otherwise you just go ping pong back, phone food work, escape, yeah right, like basically yeah, out of it is yeah it's I mean it's honestly most people's complete lives.

Sara:

So you know, I mean this is what I think is so beautiful of gaining the awareness about these different energies that we have inside of ourselves, because our masculine energy is a strength, is a tool, is a amazing thing that we have the ability to access. My masculine energy is why I am who I am today, why I am trying to run four businesses right now and, you know, am financially stable and have the things that I desire to have in life and can go travel when I want to and drive the car I want to and like. Yes, that is from my masculine energy of being a empowered individual.

Hannah:

Yeah.

Sara:

Now I'm shifting into, though, how is my masculine energy also holding me back? Right, because there there comes a point where you start to gain the awareness of okay, I was this way because this is the only way that I was ever taught to be, and now that I'm learning so much more and I'm on this deep feminine journey, how can I make this energy be my primary energy, while not letting go of being someone who is great in business and still, you know, able to complete the things that I need to complete, but is not making an unrealistic schedule for myself where I'm going to burn out?

Sara:

yeah so, yeah, it is such a delicate balance and I think let's talk about you know what we would recommend for people to get in more of that balance. And I'm going to just start with because I'm talking so much about being in the masculine, like we were talking about some grounding things getting out in nature, but how you can start to shift out of your masculine or invite in more of that balance.

Hannah:

That reminds me of an episode that we released last year, episode 64, about getting grounded. So if you guys want some tools on how to get grounded, you guys can tune into that, but for me, I really feel like it's creating the container, the masculine container, for your feminine to thrive, right. So, whatever the case is that you're feeling in super in your masculine like, let's say, work, for example, because this is a huge thing for female entrepreneurs who are going after their dreams, tapping into their passions, like I think I guess for me, what I would recommend is creating a container, a balanced container, of when you are working, right, setting your schedule and saying like, okay, I'm working, for me a boundary, I'm working nine to four. Okay, like details about that boundary. I'm like, okay, could shift a little bit, and that's my feminine. I'm like flowing, um, but like having, I think, like a container of rules of like, okay, I'm going to do work from this time to this time and I'm going to be done here, right, Creating that one rule and saying like, from 5 PM and on during the weekday, I'm not working because I know that the days are long.

Hannah:

I'm super focused, I'm super in my masculine and I know that from five to nine, monday through Friday, I need space to flow, to be in nature, to have connection with my partner, to do these things. So I am creating that intentional space in my day so I can flow and let go and get back in my body and feel the feelings that I want to feel Like I think it's like just putting small restrictions on things. Or, like you, whatever, that's just just one day that you can look forward to saying, like Wednesday at 2 pm, I'm done with work, and from 2 to 10 on Wednesdays, that's a me day. I'm gonna go and I'm gonna go do an ice bath. I'm gonna go to a sound healing, I'm gonna go take a goddess bath, right like. So I think like creating space intentionally for bath, right like. So I think like creating space intentionally for the energies to thrive, like that would be like I don't know. One tip that I think is super helpful for me.

Sara:

I love that you said that, because that was exactly what I was going to say is giving your masculine a job yeah someone said that to me, don't know, probably a year and a half ago, and that really struck me for the first time of oh, that's how I can actually make my masculine shut the hell up. Give my masculine a task of like you're saying a structure somewhere that that energy can be contained, because when we don't contain that energy, it takes over our lives as women. It seeps into everything. Now we're trying to over control everything. We're trying to do every single thing. We're taking on things that we can't actually take on. We are too much in our power, and I have had many.

Sara:

When I've gone to do various Reiki healings, I've been told many times like your solar plexus is way over stimulated, like you're going too fast.

Sara:

You know, if you think of the chakras as how they're turning and the energy centers and the speed at how they turn, like my solar plexus will be like and that is overstimulation and being too much in my masculine, and then my sacral will be shut down, which is, you know, more of my connection to my, my femininity.

Sara:

So when you are able to create that container for here is what the masculine needs in order to thrive then that allows your feminine to come in and say, ok, now I get to have this space that feels like mine to do whatever I need to do, and a lot of times the feminine does not want to have a super clear plan. So that's something that I also have to resist and that I would say is a tip of like keep it loose as your plan. If you're going to have, you know, don't over plan. This is something that I used to do and it contributed to my burnout, and it is a masculine trait as well. Well, I'm going to plan every single moment of my week and I'm going to do this then and this next, and this next, and even when I'm off work, I'm going to have an event this day and something to do that day and something to do that day. And it just put my masculine in even more overdrive because it removed any possibility of choice.

Hannah:

Yeah.

Sara:

Of uncertainty of flow, Because let's be real, who you are on a Monday is not necessarily who you are on a Thursday. Actually, who you are on a Sunday, when you're actually planning the week, may not be who you are on a Thursday Right Like Thursday you're actually planning the week may not be who you are on a Thursday right Like Thursday you're exhausted. You've been running your masculine through all freaking week and Thursday night you're like why the hell did I plan this blah, blah, blah thing to go to Because my feminine wants to take a bath and read a book and, freaking, close my eyes and go to bed at 830. Yeah, you know so, and that is also another tip Go ahead Go ahead.

Hannah:

Well, I was going to say, and for our sisters in the feminine, maybe a little too, maybe you should go to the event, you should stick to it.

Sara:

Yeah, yeah, you're right. Depends on get, get to know where you're at. Where is your imbalance? Where do you need to give more attention?

Hannah:

I love that.

Hannah:

What you were saying, too, about like keeping it open to what is to come, like I like every night lately I have my like altar and I just have like a pillow and I go and I just arrive there Like I'm not, like I have, and I go and I just arrive there Like I'm not, like I have to do this at 830.

Hannah:

I just I just find myself gravitating there, like it's just kind of my like self-love, like embodiment corner and I just like find myself going to sit on the pillow there and I, like you know, then I end up like usually playing like some soft, like playlist and then just like flowing, like maybe I pick a card or maybe I do a little dance, or like move my hips or like look into my eyes, like okay, sounds so cheesy but, like you know, really tapping into my energy, and like those moments at night are never planned like planned, but like just feel the best and I think it's because it's led by intuition, so, like listening to your heart, listening to your body, I've been really been in this embodiment practice.

Hannah:

Yesterday I went swimming and I was like it feels so good to feel this in my body. How can we prioritize more, play, more embodiment practices, like naturally, throughout the day, when your intuition is like I'm so? Am I masculine right now? What do I need to do? Yeah, how do I need to get into my body and like move through, like it's just getting out of the head and into the body?

Sara:

I swear every time yes, I love that and I love what you're saying about just arriving and being and inviting whatever is meant to come up of doing womb work. And this morning I was doing some stuff at my altar and I was meditating, and then you know I'm like okay, I'm gonna go make breakfast now, I'm gonna try to like get into work, you know, and I tried to to go towards that direction, you know, but then there was something that was just like pulling me back and I I know it's because I'm getting in more connection with with my feminine in my womb is like you have been so in your masculine and here you are, like you're accessing this sacred part of you, and now you're like right back into, like how can I produce, produce, produce, produce, produce, like check more things off the to-do list? And you have to check things off the to-do list, like you cannot just completely throw away the to-do list, because it I mean you, you can hey, if you, if that's your, if that's your vibe, that's your vibe. But it's really about listening to ourselves, not only listening to what's in your mind, but, like you're saying, listening to your heart, listening to your body.

Sara:

For me, now I'm listening to my womb and I was trying to get on my computer and whatever, and literally my wisdom is like go lay in your bed for an hour in silence and, just like I didn't go to sleep, I was just like there, you know, and allowing things to come through, what needed to come up up. So I think that a big part about balancing these energies as well is about tuning in, being aware, listening to your body, understanding what are the signs that show me that I'm overbalanced in my masculine? What are the signs that show me that I'm overbalanced in my masculine? What are the signs that show me that I'm overbalanced in my feminine or underbalanced? And how can I start to develop my own toolbox of things that pull me back to the ideal balance that I want to be in?

Hannah:

Hmm, yes, yes, yeah, beautiful, I feel a little I feel tapped back into my feminine after this episode.

Sara:

I love that. Thank you so much for listening, joining us if this resonated with you. We send you love because you are in a very similar place on your journey as we are, and we are building a community of women that understand each other, see each other, value each other, and you are invited to be a part of that community. So follow us on social media. We post very often on TikTok as well as Instagram. We have the links to our social pages in the show notes.

Sara:

Also, on this topic of divine feminine energy activation, I want to share about the Awakened Woman Retreat, my retreat that I am co-hosting in December in Mexico. If you are a woman that desires to connect more with her divine feminine, activate your highest timeline, alchemize your wounds, your fears, the beliefs that have been holding you back, and create those into your power, this retreat is for you. There is more information in the show notes, the website, which shows the location, all the information, the application, all of it. So go check it out there. Also, we have a bunch more episodes about this topic October. Oh, like 10 episodes? We do, I'm sure. We have 10 episodes October 2023.

Hannah:

We recorded like six episodes, all on feminine energy, how to bring it into your life. You can start by looking at episode 84. If you guys are interested in tuning in and really tapping into that feminine embodiment that we all desire to feel, so go check out those past episodes and they're really going to help.

Sara:

Yeah, so many more tools tricks. We even had a guest on that. We talked about masculine energy with that. That was a really amazing episode, so we can link those as well in the show notes and we love you. Thank you for joining us. We'll be back with you soon. Tune in every single Monday Mindfully, moody, hot Girl. Walk. Get your motivation, your daily dose and have a beautiful week.

Hannah:

Bye.

People on this episode

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Hannah Andersen

Host
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Sara Swanson

Host